Woman takes up running to help her cope with grief

A WOMAN from Whitchurch who took up running again to deal with the grief of losing a parent has signed up for next month’s Reading Half Marathon.

Sabina Reed, 48, ran as a hobby for several years until her mother Lesley became ill and was diagnosed with lung cancer in 2023. She died last month aged 69.

Mrs Reed, who works as a bookkeeper, wanted to focus her attention away from the grief and was encouraged to take on the half marathon by her brother, Arron Richards, 32.

She said: “After my mother passed away, I just wanted to focus on something to help with the grief, so I got back into running and finally managed to run a 5km again but then I needed another challenge. It was my brother who said he was going to run the half marathon so I said I would join him.

“It has really helped give me some focus and it gets me outside doing some fitness. It’s also something that fits in around everyday life. I can go in the morning, on my lunch break or after work.”

Mrs Reed will be joined in the half marathon by her husband Jonathan, 50, a panel beater, her daughter, Emily-Jayne, 23, a supervisor at Nando’s and her brother. The family intends to raise funds to support hospice charity Sue Ryder to thank its nurses for their efforts in providing care in the final months of Lesley’s life.

“She would be really proud,” said Mrs Reed. “She wanted to stay at home and I’ve never had to care for anyone before in that respect and I didn’t know what I was doing and Sue Ryder was brilliant.

“They gave us everything, equipment, helped with her medication and kept her really comfortable and reassured all of us because we became worried about her when she got to the point where she couldn’t communicate. To have that support was really good.”

During her training the furthest Mrs Reed has run so far is 12 miles and she will start tailing off her running distances ahead of the race on March 23.

She said: “That run was really exhausting and I hit a wall but I just had to push past it and through it and then I got a second wind. That gave me the confidence that I could do the half marathon because I was a bit worried. My husband dragged me through the last two miles. I would have given up without him.

“When I started in October, I tried to increase the running but it’s difficult over December and I found it really hard trying to run through winter when its windy and rainy.”

Her brother will wear a lion outfit, Lesley’s favourite animal, and the family will be supported by friends and other family members who will be scattered around the course cheering them on. They hope to take the race steadily, aiming to finish under the four-hour mark. Mrs Reed said: “I’m hoping that having my husband, daughter and brother there will drag me through the last mile. I also want to enjoy the atmosphere, as I don’t run with music on.”

Before Lesley’s death last month, Mrs Reed and her mother discussed how to find a way to connect with her when she passed, through their shared belief of reincarnation.

She said: “Someone said to me, you need to find a way to connect with her when she’s gone and I didn’t really understand it because I’ve never lost anyone close and I said ‘What are you going to come back as’ and she said ‘I’m going to be a bird’, so when I’m running and I see a bird, I feel like she’s always cheering me on.”

Mrs Reed encourages others who are stuck in grief to find a strong support system. She said: “It’s really important to try and connect with people, but I still feel alone because no one else can go through it with you, it’s your journey.

“I never suffered from anxiety, yet I feel really anxious when I go outside, but I remember my husband going through that, so I know it’s quite normal.

“Just getting through each day sometimes is enough. Don’t be too hard on yourself. I found to deal with it, it’s like a stone. It doesn’t get any bigger and it doesn’t get any smaller, it’s always with you but you just get stronger at carrying it around.”