Refugees need our help, end narrative of division

AS I walked through Market Place last week I was struck by how beautiful Henley looked in the autumn sunshine, with the summer’s bunting and Union flags still fluttering. I’m proud of my home town and usually love to see the flags fly but I was saddened by the fact that our flag has been weaponised.

As well as running a business in town I run the Henley Refugee Support Facebook group and volunteer with refugee charity Care4Calais, supporting refugees throughout the Thames Valley.

I am trusted by people who have lost everything and have newly arrived in the UK, at moments when they feel a maelstrom of emotions, relief, grief, guilt, anxiety and bewilderment.

We deliver emergency clothes packs, ensure people have essentials like painkillers and help people navigate complicated paperwork.

It’s easy to underestimate the value of a welcoming smile. One teenager told me I was the first person to “smile at [his] face” since he left his mother. It brought home the enormity of how it must feel to be alone in a strange country.

We become one community, working together to organise events, give talks, run winter night shelters and help those most in need. We’ve had some great winter warmer parties for the homeless at the Quakers Meeting House. The Henley Quakers are very generous with use of their beautiful garden and often raise funds for us via events such as snowdrop teas.

In one of the emergency clothes packs we delivered recently was a brand-new pair of shoes. The shoes are extra special because they were purchased by Ali, a Sudanese man who had claimed asylum.

I remember my first meeting with Ali vividly, his belongings had been lost and he was wrapped in a bed sheet from his hostel. We gave him basic clothes items and a second-hand pair of trainers. I always try to include a small treat in the emergency packs, nail clippers (you would not believe the smiles they raise), a note pad or a bar of chocolate. Ali now has refugee status and his first job in Scotland.

He told me: “I remember the moment I came here with nothing and Care4Calais were here to help with so much. I thank all of the people in Care4Calais who work so hard to help people in need.”

Ali is no stranger to helping, while he lived here in the Thames Valley he assisted with many clothes distributions and frequently handed out food to the homeless. So, we were touched but not surprised, when he spent some of his first pay packet to send shoes for us to give to someone else in need. The shoes went to another Sudanese man who has recently been forced to escape the horrific conflict in Sudan, described by the UNHCR as the world’s worst humanitarian crisis. This feels like the right person to walk in Ali’s shoes.

Two weeks ago, I gave a lift to four men who had claimed asylum in the UK, while my daughters drove three others in their car. Each car journey is a voyage of discovery.

We chat about local delicacies, family traditions and the news. I learnt that in Somalia they eat lots of pasta with bananas, in Afghanistan, they say that when two people who pass under a rainbow at same time, they will fall in love. Kuwaitis say that passing under a rainbow changes someone’s gender.

One of the men spoke near fluent English. He’s a doctor, who had just qualified when his hospital in Sudan was destroyed and his life was threatened. I asked what specialism he’d like to pursue. He originally wanted to be a surgeon but, given all the suffering he’s witnessed, he now thinks he might become a psychiatrist. Another worked alongside British forces in Afghanistan. He went into hiding with his family, fled and they travelled across Europe to reach safety in the UK. When one of his daughters fell ill in Calais, he agreed with his wife that he would make the dangerous Channel crossing alone. Now he prays to be able to bring his family here safely as soon as possible. I’m not religious but I prayed too.

We also talk about the news and current affairs. Over recent weeks the rise in anti-migrant rhetoric has been intense, protests organised by Tommy Robinson and other far-right activists have stoked fear and division. Asylum seekers have become scared to leave their rooms and those who support them have received abuse and threats from people who claim to be protecting our women and children. “Me and some of my friends were locked in our rooms,” an Eritrean friend told me. “We lost trust in people because we thought we would be killed or attacked by some of them.”

I would be lying if I said I haven’t feared for the safety of myself and my family during recent protests. But I’m driven by the desire to counter racism, promote equality and attempt to improve our communities for all. When people who stand up for dignity and justice are silenced, it’s not just them under attack, it’s the kind of country we all live in and the human rights that protect us all.

Nigel Farage says he would pay the Taliban and similar regimes in order to send refugees back, back to the places where they will face oppression, violence and persecution.

Please don’t let a narrative of hate divide our communities. Human rights protect every one of us. Let’s keep kindness, compassion and togetherness as our values.

For more information about refugees and how to help, visit the Henley Refugee Support Facebook group or email sam.jonkers@care4calais.org

l Sam Jonkers lives and works in Henley with her husband and two children. In 2022, Mrs Jonkers was recognised in the Alice Driver Awards, for inspirational women due to her work with the Care4Calais crisis charity, which helps families who were brought to Britain to escape conflict in their homelands.